I feel like shit

I think it’s around two weeks I’ve been on Citalopram now.

Most the side effects have gone, or at least the nausea has. I still get full after just a few bites of food, I hardly ever feel hungry, and thinking about food (to plan meals) makes me feel ill.

I haven’t had an episode of panic since I started, I think the past four or five days I’ve had virtually no anxiety, and my energy levels have been good…maybe bordering on hypomanic a few times, but nothing major at all.

Psychosis is still the same, which at least means it hasn’t gotten any worse.

Today though I feel like absolute shit. I didn’t take my Citalopram last night because my chest felt tight and I had a big argument with Gog because he won’t let me cook for myself but none of the meals he prepares are in any way healthy, so I said if he wasn’t gonna let me eat healthy I wasn’t gonna take my med, in case it was doing anything to my heart.

Yesterday I was a little irritable or short tempered, but today I feel pretty damn low, and am really pissed off at the world and frustrated with everything.  I just want to sit and scream and cry, and tear my hair out.

I doubt all this was caused by missing one dose.

Fucking furious. Especially because I had been coping so well with so many things, and then the one day I lose it is the day we have a friend coming over…

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