Why must I be out in the world?!

We signed up to the new GP surgery today, the other one in our town.

We get there, and the receptionist says that although we’ll be signed to this surgery, most appts will be at the other surgery, a 25 minute bus ride away…whyyyyy?!

Apparently you can see Dr’s at our surgery, it’s just a longer wait as there are fewer appt slots there. We said that was fine as the previous surgery left you waiting 3 weeks for an emergency appt XD

Even so, apparently we have to have a ‘meet and greet’ appt with the GP before we will be registered, and that has to be at the far away surgery…this sucks because I’m already going to freaking out (I haven’t had a physical appt at a surgery in a few years, and this will be a new surgery with a new Dr!) and the bus will make me very sensitive seizures too. Add some stress and I’ll be fucked >__<

The receptionist said the lighting was dim at that surgery too, when I asked, but my bf still wants to try and get the meet and greet at the nearby one. Idk.

Filling the questionnaire in was fun, considering all the information they demanded from you, and I had no idea what to put for epilepsy…I’m 98% certain I have epilepsy (as my seizures are light triggers, no t tonic clonic, and I have auras – all are incredibly rare with NES), but as I’m not diagnosed I couldn’t circle it.

In the end I circled everything, and put seizures under investigation, which is what a previous Dr wrote on my fit note.

Whilst we were out I also goggled up and got to go in the second hand bookstore, where I haven’t been able to go for years due to seizures and lighting. I love this place, and found a very old interesting dog breed book 😀


We’ll see you in a week’s time…or tomorrow!

Today was the day I bit the bullet and called Anon’s new GP back, whether she wanted me to or not – she would never be comfortable with me trying to get her help, and she does need it.

I spent a while reassuring and calming her, but when I called the surgery and then again when the GP phoned back she began trembling so hard she couldn’t concentrate on reading, and she had to leave the room.

When I first phoned and explained Anon’s symptoms, the receptionist told me I wouldn’t be able to speak with a Doctor (ie. get a phone call appointment) until a week from today. So next Wednesday, Unless Anon was suicidal and in danger of killing herself. What the hell?!

I calmly explained that Anon is hallucinating throughout the day, every day. She has extreme paranoia and can’t tell what is and isn’t real. I said if I wasn’t watching her, she would harm herself greatly.

When asked again if she was suicidal and in danger I said no, because I am here, but if she was alone she would most certainly badly injure herself, if not succeed in killing herself.

The receptionist said Anon’s new GP would phone us back this evening, and decide for himself if he wanted to see us next week.

The Doctor phoned and I explained that we are at crisis point. I explained that Anon is experiencing psychotic symptoms outside of a mood episode, she is struggling greatly and, truth be told, so am I.

We talked a bit about the ‘new’ symptoms (feeling she is not in control of her actions / speech, that the world isn’t ‘real’, that people are spying on her etc) and the Doctor was fantastic. He came across as being genuinely concerned about Anon / us, and really seemed to want to help.

He booked us in for an appointment tomorrow (bit sooner than next week!), and asked if I would be able to make sure I was with Anon 24/7 and make sure she is safe. I told him that’s what I do every day, and was relieved he understood the gravity of the situation 🙂

The Doctor reminded me I could phone 111 if we couldn’t last until tomorrow, and he said it would be a good idea for me to be there at the appointment (I don’t think we’d get Anon through the door without me…). He had no trouble with me saying that I might have to do a significant bit of the talking, as Anon is not in a good place, and he was fine with me mentioning a few things Anon won’t be comfortable talking about.

I really hope this appointment goes well…